Lessons from the apple trees

When we first moved into this area, we found the Bucklers and became friends.  Kami is amazing.  She had apple trees, flourishing garden and a huge strawberry patch, all growing outside their mobile home in this dry parched soil.  She gave me hope.  I had been killing and then pulling various trees off of our property and nothing seemed to grow for me but weeds and pine trees.  I asked her lots of questions and then Michael and I set out to purchase apple trees.

Her advice was sound.  We planted on the east side of the house.  That way when there is snow on the Superstition Mountains and the wind rushes down it offers enough chill hours.  We pointed the little graft stub on the bottom to the east also and made sure it was above the soil level.  We've watered and tended to them for a few years now.  There were a few lessons along the way though that I have pondered and compared to being a parent.

Apple trees are like children in that they learn and are influenced when they are calm and relaxed.  Apple branches should be pruned in December or January when the tree is most dormant.

Making all their choices for them limits their confidence in making choices on their own. In the beginning this little tree tended to lean towards the house so I staked it and put a small string on it, unfortunately I left it on too long and now the tree leans slightly to the street.

Surrounding them with uplifting music, pictures, conversation, encouragement, and love helps them to reach for more light.  Trim the tree so that the branches are growing up, and that light and air can circulate freely.

Keeping things simple and staying away from do as I say, not as I do keeps their thoughts about what could be a good choice or a bad one from being criss crossed.  Remove any dead branches or branches that cross.

Saying no just because the spirit tells you to, not because you have a justifiable reason can be very uncomfortable.  Prune the tree a little more than you are comfortable with.

Stepping back and looking at the whole person, 

not just as your child, but as a child of God and their surroundings can help you better understand. 

Step back and look at the tree from all angles to find the best shape.

 

I have been parenting for 33 years and pruning apple trees for about 8.  My heart has grown, been broken, repaired, and has grown some more.  I am definitely not the best parent.  I have learned to forgive myself and my children.  I have learned to trust the Holy Ghost and follow his promptings better.  I have learned to love and appreciate my own parents and grandparents more and more.  I still make mistakes, but most of all these experiences and relationships have taught me how to love more and better.  I still have a long way to go.